Thursday, April 19, 2007

Romantic “Pet Names” for Significant Others

My personal as well as professional experience has revealed that “romance” is a nebulous phenomenon that is easier to describe than define. It is easy to define romance with simplistic statements such as “Romance is showing you care.” Sure, it sounds good at first, but although draping your coat over a puddle and asking if she remembered to brush her teeth that morning may be actions triggered by this same motivation, yet they indeed will rate distinctly differently on any romance scale.

As I am addressing in my two new companion self-help books on adult loving relationships, a pivotal part of adult romantic relationships is the “language of love.” Moreover, part of the “language of love” is that a couple builds cute nicknames or pet names the two create for each other. They are the soft terms of endearment that are whispered at the end of an evening, or chuckled during a phone call.

Websites such as “Romance Class” includes a variety of “Terms for a Couple” which you may find interesting. Furthermore, “Links to Love” actually will help you pick a pet name for your significant other.

In my first contemporary romance novel, My Sweetpea: Seven Years and Seven Days, Troy was the only on in Sheila’s life to call her “Sweetpea.” Likewise, in my recently published novel, Fear of Feeling Loved, Jack refers to Marcia as “Pretty Lady” and in my newest novel which is currently at the publisher, If Ever Again… It’ll be for Love, Michael is the only one to refer to Diane as “Dee.”

Question: Do you and your significant other have a “pet name” for each other (and if so, is there a story behind it)?



Cole Reising said...

I found this interesting from the aspect of it making me think... I have three boys, all whom I've nicknamed with my own terms of endearment. For example, my last boy was unexpected, my husband had a vasectomy that didn't work but we didn't realize this until too late. :) Anyhow, I call my him(my youngest that is) 'my little love bug'.

In all my books when I think about it, I have done the same, ironically and I suppose this could be telling me something, but all the men give their gal's a nickname such as green eyes or some such thing that only they ever call her.

But what I found most interesting was... my hubby and I don't have any such thing between us.

hmmmmm, don't know what to think of that! :)

As always, great post!

Dr. Bill Emener said...

Hi Cole,
Thanks for stopping by and sharing your some of your family nicknames. It's not uncommon for siblings, parents and children to have "pet names" for each other as well as "lovers."
"Pet names" (or nicknames) between significant others are not necessary for a healthy, vibrant and loving relationship -- sometimes they just tend to be there. Nonetheless, "per names" are endearing and simply add to the specialness of the relationship.
Thanks again!

DH said...

Hmmm, my husband likes to call me "sparkle eyes". He started saying this on our first date. He says he was completely mesmerized. What is really so now, when he says that, it takes me back to that wonderful dreamy love state that I felt when we first started dating. The tremendous power such a small simple thing's a blessing. He is my knight in Shining Armor. DH

Dr. Bill Emener said...

Hello "Sparkle Eyes,"
Thanks for adding a meaningful aspect of a pet name -- it "takes us back" (to a memorable moment in the past).
You're fortunate (to feel so loved "by your knight in sining armor").
Thanks again for your insightful addition to this issue,