Tuesday, December 19, 2006

In Romance Novels There Can Be Different Types of Love

By definition, romance novels typically illustrate and frequently feature the phenomenon of “romantic love.” Nonetheless, when I write my novels, contemporary romance novels, I build the storyline around selected critical adult loving relationship issues (which by the way I address in depth in my self-help book, Adult Loving Relationships [amazon.com]). Interestingly however, there are numerous types of love.

The website Visions of Love (visionsoflove) suggests that there are Nine Types of Love: (1) Affection (which includes caring, hugging and kissing); (2) Sexual Love (which highlights physical attraction, arousal and lust); (3) Platonic Love (which includes friendship and non-sexual caring); (4) Romantic Love (which involves candlelight dinners, taking walks, happiness and idealism); (5) Puppy Love (which typically occurs at a young age, involves infatuation and usually is not long lasting); (6) Friendship (including feeling free to talk about anything, helping, honesty and doing thing together); (7) Committed Love (which typically is long lasting, includes commitment and usually continues regardless of the circumstances); (8) Infatuation (which typically is not long lasting, and includes physical attraction and feeling intrigued by some fascinating quality of the person); and (9) Passionate Love (which involves sexual experiences, intense thinking about the other person and bonding).

“Self-Creation” (selfcreation) addresses different types of love and states, “We establish relationships with many different types of people – our family members, neighbors, co-workers, friends, spouses, significant others, etc. We've been taught that the love is different depending on who we’re loving. We even have different names for it such as Agape for spiritual love and Eros for sexual love.”

“Love Detector” (love-detector) intriguingly talks about three important aspects of love: (1) liking vs. loving; (2) companionate vs. passionate love; and (3) bio-physiological love.

The psychologist side of me harkens to a well-known quote from the Sigmund Freud, “We are never so helplessly unhappy as when we lose love.” My undergraduate English major side, moreover, recalls Lord Alfred Tennyson’s challenging tenet: “It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.”

Love, Bill


Anonymous said...

Sure, you say love Bill, but do you really mean it, ha,ha..

Dr. Bill Emener said...

Hello happy and blue 2,
Okay... you got me! Truth is that I actually signed off with "Love" as a tongue-in-cheek way of connecting with the topic of the Post (love). If there was any love in my "Love", however, it would have been the "Friendship" type.

Unknown said...

Happy and Blue you sure do get around? How do you find the time?

Glad you're enjoying it. And Bill, great post.