E-mail Etiquette and its Impact on Interpersonal Relationships

Over the past couple of days, one of my personal attitudes towards emails again reared its ugly head. My view, okay -- my perception -- is that an e-mail sent “TO:” me is different from an e-mail that is a “CC:” to me. Moreover, I consider an e-mail sent “TO” me almost akin to someone saying something to me. That being said, when I send an e-mail “TO” someone and I never get any kind of reply, I consider it rude on his or her behalf. I timed it – it takes me less than 10 seconds to click on Reply, type “Thanks, Bill,” and click on Send. So when I send someone an e-mail and never get any kind of reply, my brain says to me, I’m not even worth 10 seconds of this individual’s time. Wow, do I feel important! Do I feel special! I really feel close to, and good about, this person!

I found some very interesting and informative Websites that address e-mail etiquette. For example, e-mailreplies.com addresses the question, “Why do you need e-mail etiquette?” and suggests three primary reasons: Professionalism, Efficiency, and Protection from Liability. The site also lists and briefly discusses 32 “most important e-mail etiquette tips.” Under the heading, “E-Mail Etiquette,” iwillfollow.com accurately warns, “Too many users assume that the minute someone receives an e-mail it, the person will read it. Bad assumption.” And, emailaddresses.com discusses five categories of good e-mail etiquette: (1) Don't Overquote; (2) Treat E-mail Confidentially; (3) Don’t Dice Up Names; (4) Don’t Blast Messages Around Indiscriminately; and, (5) Think Twice Before Sending HTML Mail.

In my recently published pop psych book, Mom and Dad’s Pearls of Wisdom… You Gotta Love ’Em, I tell of the time I met two, young, twin boys, who were on vacation, fishing with their father. As I was walking past them, I paused, kneeled down, and talked with them briefly. On my way back when I passed the three of them, about twenty minutes later, the father said to me, “My boys really liked meeting you.” I smiled and said, “Good. I enjoyed talking with them as well.” He smiled back, glanced at his sons, and then said to me, “I guess it’s sorta’ like my daddy use’ to say –
You never get a second chance
To make a first impression.

Whether it be in your professional life or your personal life, if making good impressions on others – and having good interpersonal relationships with others – is important to you, then remember: the next time you receive an e-mail from anyone, it may only take you 10 seconds to do it.

Bill