Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Being Romantic Involves Love, Caring and Skills

In spite of there being a maelstrom of attention to being more romantic and loving in today’s world, in my November 14, 2006 Post, On Being Loving…, I concluded my opening paragraph with “the importance of being loving can never be overestimated.” Nonetheless, when anyone says, “I want to be more romantic to him or her,” it is important for them to remember – being romantic minimally requires three things: (1) you have to feel love (toward the person); (2) you have to care (about him or her and how they feel); and, (3) you have to have skills. Being romantic necessitates knowing how to be romantic.

On the Internet, there are three insightful and helpful interesting articles on “how to be romantic.” The first, entitled “Being Romantic” (thesite.org/beingromantic), offers advice on how to bring romance into a relationship and different ways of adding spontaneous passion into your love life. Another helpful piece is “Romantic Things to Do to Keep Your Relationship Vibrant, Alive and Exciting” by Susie and Otto Collins (collinspartners.com). And the third, entitled, Tips for Being More Romantic does just that – it offers suggestions of ways to be more romantic (isearch4u.com).

There also are numerous books available on the subject as well. Over the years, in my private practice as a licensed psychologist, there were two books that I recommended frequently. Both of them are paperbacks by Ellen Kreidman: (1) Light Her Fire: How to Ignite Passion, Joy, and Excitement in the Women You Love (amazon.com); and (2) Light His Fire: How to Keep Your Man Passionately and Hopelessly in Love With You (amazon.com).

Hallmark cards has a unique slogan – “Care enough to give the best.” Regarding being romantic, my slogan is: “Care enough to be good at it.”

Hugs around, Bill

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I agree, and would add that it is important to understand what makes the other person feel loved, as you have mentioned in class. There is a great book on this, called "Love Languages". -Barb

Dr. Bill Emener said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Bill Emener said...

Hi Barb,
Thanks for the Comment, and I thank you for your excellent point. If I want you to feel loved by me, then I have to know what to do (and not do) so that you indeed feel loved by me. And for our other Commenting friends, the book to which you referred certainly is great: "The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate" by Gary Chapman (amazon.com).
Bill